In answer to a thread about the ability to "learn" to be dominant.
I absolutely think that people can change, develop new desires, have recessive personality traits come forward. As humans, I believe we all have the ability to submit or dominate in various degrees, in all facets of our life. Certainly, where we fall on that particular scale changes depending on the circumstances, who we are interacting with and such.
I know lots of folks will say, "I am dominant at work, but a slave at home, but my social life and my sexual identity are separate". I don't agree. I think we are just reacting to the situation in the appropriate manner for us. Even at work we might be more of a "switch" in that regard, having to obey the directives of a superior, and direct those who are in our charge. We are fluid creatures. We can do both, be both.
Some, who start in a menial position, with no real desire or need to be in charge, find that they are really good at it when put in that position. The potential was there in waiting, but they didn't even realize it since the situation wasn't right for it.
This same "change" can often be seen in parents who may start as nurturers, but then also develop authoritarian personalities in regards to their offspring in order to guide and shape them.
I see the same potential for fluidity in our pair bondings. While usually I'm most fulfilled, satisfied, and happy in a subservient role to my owner, at times certain women will bring out the predator in me. It's not every woman, or even every submissive woman, or even every submissive woman I find hot. It's very specific to certain women that I have a particular chemistry with. When that happens, it's a fun and delicious thing. But, if the circumstances are not right, it's just not going to happen.
So yes, I can see a previously vanilla husband/bf having their dominant side sparked by the right situation. But it's not always going to happen. It depends on the chemistry of the people involved and learning what behaviors and such will bring out those recessive traits.
Far too many submissive women think that Dominance should be easy. And it is, if you don't have to deal with the thoughts, feelings, health, mental stability, external stressors, family responsibilities of those you are dominating and just existed inside a bubble.
I have no direct experience other than what I related, but I was once friends with a couple who I've since lost contact with.
They were married, and when I met them, she was his slave and he was a rather sadistic and controlling owner. He had determined, when they met as a "vanilla" couple, that he was looking for an owner for himself, so rather than search for one, he found someone to train to be his Mistress. They signed a contract for a year with him as Master. When that year ended, she became owner, and was, in every way from what they both told me.
They had a very intense relationship, and frankly, I wouldn't have expected the switch to work as well as it did, but it DID. It may be because they were both psychologists, I don't know. I know that they weren't playing at anything. From what she said, she had never had either submissive or dominant fantasies prior to meeting him but was willing to go along with what he wanted. I have to say, also, that after the switch there was no waffling or topping from the bottom that I could see. The power transfer was absolute. It was fascinating.
