Do you act like a slave?

A question about "acting like a slave" over on fetlife got me thinking.

I'm not sure exactly what you're getting at then? Protocols? Cliche slave behaviors?

I'm rather jaded about them. I've seen plenty of submissives and slaves go through the motions with no real meaning behind them. Especially in public. I think they can be important, though, especially in long term relationships.

In particular, I think it's important that they be enforced by both parties. I know that I found myself going into autopilot after several years. Things we both considered important at one time went by the wayside, and it wasn't too long before we started having no overt signs of being in a power dynamic whatsoever. He had final say, but everything else was gone.

I know some folks find that sort of comfortableness just fine. I don't. For me there's a certain amount of vigilance that I put into my relationship now that I didn't realize a need for previously. So I suppose those behaviors are what you're asking about? It's not so much screaming "slave" as being an internal notification that I'm doing what I'm supposed to be doing. It's often subtle, and probably rarely observed outside the relationship.

I feel part of my job is to empower him through actions, words and deeds. So, following through on his orders, maintaining a respectful tone, deferring to him during discussions, letting him see / know my vulnerabilities, sharing intimate thoughts that he might find interesting and amusing, following whatever protocols/rituals/routines that he lays out for me as best I can, asking for correction when I start drifting. That stuff, to me, is the important stuff. These things that I often struggle with.

The more I work to empower him, the more often he's likely to use that power and control and allow me to feel his dominance. It's a symbiotic sort of thing.